My sister called me last nigh to tell me she's KU. My first reaction was shock and happiness (I knew they were TTC) but then I lost it. I started crying and told her I wasn't mad or anything, but I need to let this sink in. Then I cried straight through Bachelorette. Way to ruin the only thing I look forward to on Mondays. I cried during the night. And I cried a little this morning. Gene didn't have much to say to me or comfort to offer me (other than a hug which is always nice). I feel so alone. My sis is 2 years older than me and her husband is almost 40. So I am glad they were able to conceive (she actually had an appt set up with my RE for September) but at the same time....if them...why not us?
I think I need counseling. I'm such a mess lately.
So I'm not exactly sure how I found your blog, but somehow I stumbled across it - and boy, does it ring a bell! My situation is a little different - I can GET pregnant, it seems to be the STAYING pregnant part where I'm challenged. Regardless, the outcome is the same - we want a child and just can't have one right now! And all around, we see happy couples with their happy babies, and why can't that be us? Why is it SO easy for other people, and we have to struggle? I understand that feeling of bitterness toward pregnant women (no matter how much I hate to admit it), and I also feel "unbalanced" (as I like to say) - and think I need therapy. This doesn't make you a bad person, and it doesn't mean you're crazy! Probably the most inherent instinct in us is to mother a child, and that instinct is being denied...it makes sense that we have some less-than-perfect moments. Sorry this has been so lengthy, but I wanted to let you know that you're not alone (ugh...so cheesy). Good luck on the journey, and keep up the blog!
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